Damn, it is hot down here. Not just hot. Hawt. Bastard hawt. It's like someone fed the Sun some extra spicy chili, and the fiery ball of fusion is shitting a plasma storm of bright, bright death onto the state of Georgia.
This week in Macon, we're expecting 5 days where the temperature will meet, exceed, and possibly decimate 100 degrees. My air conditioning is working overtime. That poor bastard is hiring illegal Mexican A/C units to work night shifts for him just so he can take a fucking break.
The heat nailed me and Kell this past weekend when we took a short trip down to Savannah. Being in Macon, the drive doesn't present too much of a challenge... unless you're dying of heat stroke on the return trip. Which I was. Fuh-GOW, Savannah's humidity was off the charts. I'm not just talking about regular charts either. The weather people shipped in charts from Shaolin temples, and the humidity still could not be contained... nor even comprehended. At one point, the humidity reached 115%. The very illogical nature of that number nearly created a rip in space, time, and sanity.
But's it all good, people. As the midday Sun baked Kelly and I into crispy McNuggets, I killed a few homeless people (in Savannah, a few won't be missed) and created a makeshift tent for shade.
When that didn't work, I bought us some shaved ice! WOOOOOOO!
What's cooler than cool? The wisdom of Outkast would say unto thee, "Ice cold." I smashed that shaved ice right down my throat. I've never felt better about damaging my internal organs with frost bite.
Side note: Never... never ever... NEVAH try to check in early to a Savannah hotel. They tell you it is possible, but their words are lies filled with untruth and venom and kryptonite.
In any case, next time I attempt a visit to the historic city by the river filled with homeless people, I will do so in the winter.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Savannah Nights
The Long and Short of It
Looks like I'll be going on a short weekend trip to Savannah. Good times. I'm taking my lady down to the coast where we'll spend one night at a hotel and enjoy two days of browsing around the historic sites of the city. Kelly also has some birthday money left, so I'm sure she'll buy clothes or trinkets if anything catches her eye.
This will surely be my last summer hurrah before the school year kicks back in, and then within a year's time, I (much like Eddie is now) will have graduated from law school. I'll probably be disbarred years later for an illegal badger smuggling ring, but c'est la vie, n'est pas?
Disturbing News
Well, well, well... it appears as though part of Louisiana hasn't quite figured out this "racial equality" thing yet.
http://rawstory.com/news/afp/Racial_demons_resurface_with_nooses_05242007.html
http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/20070717_two_races_two_systems_of_justice_in_louisiana/
But still, I'm a bit surprised to see such blatant racism still in existence outside of the KKK. When you have nooses being hung when black kids play on the "whiteside" of the playground, there is something seriously f'ed up with your town.
Looks like I'll be going on a short weekend trip to Savannah. Good times. I'm taking my lady down to the coast where we'll spend one night at a hotel and enjoy two days of browsing around the historic sites of the city. Kelly also has some birthday money left, so I'm sure she'll buy clothes or trinkets if anything catches her eye.
This will surely be my last summer hurrah before the school year kicks back in, and then within a year's time, I (much like Eddie is now) will have graduated from law school. I'll probably be disbarred years later for an illegal badger smuggling ring, but c'est la vie, n'est pas?
Disturbing News
Well, well, well... it appears as though part of Louisiana hasn't quite figured out this "racial equality" thing yet.
http://rawstory.com/news/afp/Racial_demons_resurface_with_nooses_05242007.html
http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/20070717_two_races_two_systems_of_justice_in_louisiana/
Whew! Crazy stuff, my friends. Crazy stuff. I mean, of course racism still exists in America. Most of our parents were born and raised when segregation still existed and when Jim Crow laws still had sway. It's not like when the Civil Rights movement took place that everyone changed their mind.The racial demons of the Old South have resurfaced in a rural
Louisiana town where black students who tried to sit on the white side of the
school yard were met by three hangmen's nooses dangling from a tree.
The students and their parents were outraged by the stark
reminder of the mob lynchings which had terrorized Southern US blacks until just
a few decades ago.
Months of inter-racial violence followed the decision by a
white school superintendent to over-rule the principal's recommendation to expel
three white students found to have hung the nooses.
....
"Adolescents play pranks," said superintendent Roy Breithaupt.
"I don't think it was a threat against anybody."
Inter-racial fights broke out at the school and then spilled
out into the small lumber and oil town of 3,000, which is 85 percent white and
12 percent black. Someone set fire to the central wing of the high school in
November. Then a black student was beaten for showing up at an all-white party.
And a white youth pulled a shotgun on three black teens at a convenience
store.
Finally, on December 4, a group of black students jumped a
white student as he was coming out of the school gym. Even though the teen
wasn't seriously hurt, six black students were expelled and were charged with
attempted second-degree murder and other offenses for which they face up to 100
years in jail.
The white teen who beat a black party crasher was charged with
simple battery. The white youth who pulled a shotgun was not charged at
all.
But still, I'm a bit surprised to see such blatant racism still in existence outside of the KKK. When you have nooses being hung when black kids play on the "whiteside" of the playground, there is something seriously f'ed up with your town.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
And By The Way...
Iron Man the movie comes out next May, if I recall correctly. Billionaire industrialist and inventor nearly dies overseas, and upon recovery, puts his weapon designing genius to good use.
This movie will likely register a zero on the Shabbiness Scale, while hitting a 191 on the Fucktastic Meter.Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Welcome to August!
That crazy Waldo. Ever the slick pimp of characters who are hard to find. Anyway... howdy! It's been over a month since my last blogging, and I feel as though it's time to catch up on shit that has happened.
First off, I went with the lady of the house and saw the new Harry Potter film. I will say that I found it to start off pretty slow, but the movie had a nice ending to it with all sorts of magical goodness. During the movie, a person in the row directly in front of us had their phone go off. Twice.
Upon the second ringing, Kelly and some her friends that joined us all let out various murmers and muttering of disapproval that were met with the nodding of shadowy heads surrounding the woman and her twice rung phone. Not even 5 minutes later, one of Kelly's friend's phones ring. Loudly. I can't even describe how loud the ring was. The closest I can come to giving you an idea is... well... imagine what it might sound like if a 300-foot tall Chris Tucker was set on fire.
Embarassing? Somewhat. Annoying? A bit. I'm surprised that no one in the crowd threw a wand and/or wand-like object at us with all the vigor of a wanna-be wizard's wrath unleashed.
In news relating to the mouthal area, us married folk went to the dentist for a check up this prior Monday. Kelly's teeth were pretty much a-OK, seeing as how she goes in for regular check-ups like a normal person probably should. My teeth were cavity free and in good shape... but the same could not be said for my gum line. Well, it could be said, but the nurse refused no matter how much money I offered her.
Yeah, it had been a good 7 years since my last dentist visit, so normal plaque build-up (the stuff that normally gets cleared up during cleanings) turned into tartar. No, not the delicious sauce often served with chicken. This stuff was more along the lines of "calcified deposits". Rather than a normal cleaning, the nurse scheduled me for two rounds of super cleaning.
You may think the dentist is bad enough when they use the metal pick to clean your teeth... but for me, the metal pick was only used after some kinda weird drill head was jammed into my pockets. Not good pockets like "cargo pants pockets" or "Hot Pockets". Gum pockets.
After an hour of drilling, scraping, washing, and disinfecting, my teeth were as good as new. The teeth on the right side of my mouth, at least. I go back next Tuesday for the left side. Which will likely be just as painful. I mean, right after the super ultra cleaning of atomic dentistry, my mouth felt a little tender... my teeth felt a bit light. Call me crazy, but I had figured that the numbing stuff she had given me earlier already wore off. Hahaha...
As of now, the mouth feels better. I still favor my left side when eating, but I using a new electric toothbrush and some special floride paste to keep my grill spic and span.
In other news, fantasy football season is approaching, and Paul has convinced me to join his league. What does this mean? It means I'll be calling my NFL-savvy brother for tips on who to draft. I'm more of a college football man, but I figured the fantasy NFL experience would be good times and lots of laughter. Hopefully some of that laughter will be from me winning ocassionally. Lord knows this has been a rough year for me in the MLB with Boston being consistently ahead of the Empire State Pillars of Godliness known as the NY Yankees.
But I have faith the Yankees will pull through. Deepak better cheer twice as hard. His proximity to the team and stadium (compared to me) means that his cheers will multiply Yankee scores by an inverse ratio to the number of times Paul prays to his Red-Socked team of heretics... or something.
Last but not least: school news. Kinda got screwed on the job situation for this summer, but I did take a summer class (Torts II) to kinda "fill the gap", if you would. And that turned out pretty fuckin' good because I managed to CALI it. Personally, I'm not 100% sure what the letters in "CALI" stand for. I think the "L" stands for legal. Maybe the "A" is for advanced. But it basically means I got the highest score in the class, which in law school is never a bad thing.
With my last year on the horizon, I have a feeling of hope. Y'know... kinda like how Michael Vick hopes he won't go to prison for being a sack of filthy, worthless, animal-torturing douchery... except with me, my hopes are founded in reality while he's probably gonna get fucked.
Sorry for the long article, but I had a bunch to catch up with and probably still left a ton out (like the Braves game with Paul and Lauren, moving my bro out of his old GA Southern apartment, my sister's radio interview, frogs in my parents' pond, etc.), but I'll get to maybe half that crap in the future.
Adios, frère jacques, and a dormez-vous to ya.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Buckup-date
Bucket. Up-date. Buckup-date. For a title, I think that will suffice. So what's happening? Went ahead and put my home phone uner the "do not call" national registry fter getting a friggin' ridiculous telemarketer who just refused to put me on his company's own "do not call" list. Calls have already begun to reduce drastically, even though the government says the process can take upto 31 days (about how often companies check the registry).
I also hear that my pal Eddie has found employment. Fantastic. Even better is that hi job is close to home! Double thumbs up, mi amigo.
Oh, and if anybody needs to kill a little time, just do a Google search for "ant buster". Simple little online game where you just plop down a few towers to kill ants who are trying to eat your cake. Glorious, delicate cake. I can hardly wait for my 1 year aniversary just so I can dive into some leftover wedding cake. Luckily, one of Kell's friends is getting hitched in October... which means more sweet sweet wedding cake for good ole Chris! SCORE!
I also hear that my pal Eddie has found employment. Fantastic. Even better is that hi job is close to home! Double thumbs up, mi amigo.
Oh, and if anybody needs to kill a little time, just do a Google search for "ant buster". Simple little online game where you just plop down a few towers to kill ants who are trying to eat your cake. Glorious, delicate cake. I can hardly wait for my 1 year aniversary just so I can dive into some leftover wedding cake. Luckily, one of Kell's friends is getting hitched in October... which means more sweet sweet wedding cake for good ole Chris! SCORE!
Friday, June 15, 2007
The Dubbing of Your LIFE!
I know I've seen this video before. I can't remember who I showed it to though, or even how long it has been since I've seen it. But I just stumbled across it on YouTube. Absolutely fucktastic! Dialogue from other parts played by James Earl Jones... dubbed over the lines of Darth Vader in Star Wars. It's a bit hit-or-miss, but the hits are comedy gold.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Bucket O' Dreams
So the last two nights have been quite scary in the dream department. "Nightmares", if you will. If you won't, then I'm not sure what to do with you. Anyway, back to the dreams... the first one dealt with zombies.
I found myself in a semi-lucid dreamworld where zombies had risen from the grave and infected the population at large. I was trapped in a hospital, roughly on the fourth floor area. Some of the survivors stuck with me were the cast of Grey's Anatomy. I know, I know... how could things get any worse? Well things did get worse, and worse came riding in on an express flight from Hell. Even though the elevator was jammed and the stairs leading up to our floor were destroyed, the particular floor I occupied had a walkway that connected to a building across the street.
Naturally, zombies found their way up through the other building and across the walkway. The path between the buildings was covered with a solid roof, but most of the glass walls had been shattered away. The blonde chick from Grey's joined me in beating back the zombies and barring the doorway to the other building. That's when a zombie on the ground jumped about 70 feet straight up and onto the walkway.
At that point in time, my dream-self make a quick decision... and ran away. Personally, I think that was a good idea. Let the cast of that overdramatic primetime doctor porno deal with the super-leaping undead. My dream then began to fragment as I came closer to waking up. I remember being chased by zombies through the hospital's parking deck, and I escaped by hot wiring the Thundertank from Thundercats.
Sidenote: A Thundercats live-action movie is currently in the works. The studio has picked some no-name director to head it, but no casting has been done yet. Potentially, this movie could be good. I have a feeling it will turn out crappy though. Sidenote over.
So the next night, no more zombies, but now I was a young boy again back at my original home in New York. Up there, we lived near the top of a decently large hill on four acres of property. In my dream, I guess summer was the season because the trees were too full to see any neighboring properties. My parents were with me; both looking younger as well.
For some reason, a band of young teens was out to kill us. Not just any young teens though. These kids looked to be like the ones you see on TV when the news talks about the killer kids in Africa. The kids orphaned by war who get trained to be expendable killers by military factions. This dream was scary just because it was so vivid. We ran and tried to hide from the teens at first. Then we fought a few. They only had rocks and sticks. Nasty part was that I caught one and held him hostage... and then killed two teens who laid down their weapons.
Nasty, nasty, nasty. Just felt way too real.
In other news, I'm pretty sure I was the one on facebook who broke Flixter's "quickrate" feature for movies. I just went through that thing one day and rated just about every film I had ever viewed. 1,800 +. I haven't even hit all the films I have seen like the 80's classic Tango & Cash or Mallrats. C'est la vie.
I found myself in a semi-lucid dreamworld where zombies had risen from the grave and infected the population at large. I was trapped in a hospital, roughly on the fourth floor area. Some of the survivors stuck with me were the cast of Grey's Anatomy. I know, I know... how could things get any worse? Well things did get worse, and worse came riding in on an express flight from Hell. Even though the elevator was jammed and the stairs leading up to our floor were destroyed, the particular floor I occupied had a walkway that connected to a building across the street.
Naturally, zombies found their way up through the other building and across the walkway. The path between the buildings was covered with a solid roof, but most of the glass walls had been shattered away. The blonde chick from Grey's joined me in beating back the zombies and barring the doorway to the other building. That's when a zombie on the ground jumped about 70 feet straight up and onto the walkway.
At that point in time, my dream-self make a quick decision... and ran away. Personally, I think that was a good idea. Let the cast of that overdramatic primetime doctor porno deal with the super-leaping undead. My dream then began to fragment as I came closer to waking up. I remember being chased by zombies through the hospital's parking deck, and I escaped by hot wiring the Thundertank from Thundercats.
Sidenote: A Thundercats live-action movie is currently in the works. The studio has picked some no-name director to head it, but no casting has been done yet. Potentially, this movie could be good. I have a feeling it will turn out crappy though. Sidenote over.
So the next night, no more zombies, but now I was a young boy again back at my original home in New York. Up there, we lived near the top of a decently large hill on four acres of property. In my dream, I guess summer was the season because the trees were too full to see any neighboring properties. My parents were with me; both looking younger as well.
For some reason, a band of young teens was out to kill us. Not just any young teens though. These kids looked to be like the ones you see on TV when the news talks about the killer kids in Africa. The kids orphaned by war who get trained to be expendable killers by military factions. This dream was scary just because it was so vivid. We ran and tried to hide from the teens at first. Then we fought a few. They only had rocks and sticks. Nasty part was that I caught one and held him hostage... and then killed two teens who laid down their weapons.
Nasty, nasty, nasty. Just felt way too real.
In other news, I'm pretty sure I was the one on facebook who broke Flixter's "quickrate" feature for movies. I just went through that thing one day and rated just about every film I had ever viewed. 1,800 +. I haven't even hit all the films I have seen like the 80's classic Tango & Cash or Mallrats. C'est la vie.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
I Believe in a Thing Called Bucket
FYI, I reopened the comments for the last Operation: Bucket article after receiving word from my sister, the talented Jacki, that comments were somehow turned off. Weirdness.
Anywho, taking a Torts II class this summer. Should be nice in the spring semeter when I can have a lighter classload. Eddie himself is finished with this mess, but now comes his summer-long process of studying for the bar. Kinda sucks that we law students graduate from school... and then months later we have an even bigger test... the test that REALLY let's us practice law. Ah well. The graduation ceremony is pretty cool at least. Big poofy hats and getting hooded? Fantastic!
In the word of TV, all of my shows have had their season finales for the year. Heroes was especially good. That show sounds like a rip-off of X-Men at first, but it actually pulls from a lot of different comic book sources while putting a fresh spin on things. And I always love a finale that resolves the major issues for the season. Cheerleader? Saved. The world? Safe... for now. Budget for special FX? Most likely to go up due to the show's popularity, and that's awesome. The show's FX were always solid, but how much they did was always limited. I'm sure quantity will increase with the quality staying constant.
LOST also finished up for it's third season. Only three more seasons to go, according to the show's producers. CRAZY! The finale certainly had some crazy events that make it SEEM like a rescue is coming right at the beginning of next season. But certain characters seem to predict that the new rescuers might actually be a great threat. Fun stuff, and lots of badass moments. Always nice to see a series villain get absolutely beat to shit by a main character.
24? Of course it was good. They even tossed some happy endings in for side character. Unfortunately for Jack Bauer, his life continues to go down the tubes no matter how many terrorist threats he defeats. All in all, good ending to my favorite shows for this season.
Not too shabby.
Anywho, taking a Torts II class this summer. Should be nice in the spring semeter when I can have a lighter classload. Eddie himself is finished with this mess, but now comes his summer-long process of studying for the bar. Kinda sucks that we law students graduate from school... and then months later we have an even bigger test... the test that REALLY let's us practice law. Ah well. The graduation ceremony is pretty cool at least. Big poofy hats and getting hooded? Fantastic!
In the word of TV, all of my shows have had their season finales for the year. Heroes was especially good. That show sounds like a rip-off of X-Men at first, but it actually pulls from a lot of different comic book sources while putting a fresh spin on things. And I always love a finale that resolves the major issues for the season. Cheerleader? Saved. The world? Safe... for now. Budget for special FX? Most likely to go up due to the show's popularity, and that's awesome. The show's FX were always solid, but how much they did was always limited. I'm sure quantity will increase with the quality staying constant.
LOST also finished up for it's third season. Only three more seasons to go, according to the show's producers. CRAZY! The finale certainly had some crazy events that make it SEEM like a rescue is coming right at the beginning of next season. But certain characters seem to predict that the new rescuers might actually be a great threat. Fun stuff, and lots of badass moments. Always nice to see a series villain get absolutely beat to shit by a main character.
24? Of course it was good. They even tossed some happy endings in for side character. Unfortunately for Jack Bauer, his life continues to go down the tubes no matter how many terrorist threats he defeats. All in all, good ending to my favorite shows for this season.
Not too shabby.
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